Students Forced to Make New Shortcut to Proctor

proc walkway

Students wistfully remember all the good times they had on the old path, of sparing 20 seconds of walking or slipping on the ice in front of all their friends.

After groundskeepers thoughtlessly covered the path students had been forging to Redfield Proctor Dining Hall, the community is being forced to create a whole new shortcut from the sidewalk to the terrace.

“I can’t believe we’re going to have to start from scratch,” said Kimberly Dunham ‘17, shaking her head. “That dirty, dusty path was the only thing every student on campus worked together on.”

Quickly, Dunham qualified, “And by every student, I mean, every social student. I’m not including those losers at Ross.”

Although the groundskeepers have attempted to introduce similar cobblestone patches around the terrace to smooth the transition into this new aesthetic, many students feel like the additions are only adding insult to injury.

“First they cover up all our hard work, and then they go and pretend like the cobblestones are just some decoration? Walking down that shitty path to lunch made me feel rebellious, and special,” said Anthony Gonzalez ‘18. 

So far, the groundskeepers have defended their decision and said the complaints “are totally unjustified, and honestly, make no sense.” They also announced that they are going forward with other controversial measures, such as nicely labeled sidewalks and clear paths for students to cross streets safely.

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