SGA Confirmed, 10 O’Clock Ross Just Playing Hard to Get



A photo of 10 O’Clock Ross feeling under-appreciated last semester.

Insulted by the weak attendance at the end of last semester, 10 O’Clock Ross has finally admitted to intentionally holding back last week in order for students to appreciate it a little more. It told SGA, who told the school wide emailer, who told the student body, that 10 O’Clock Ross finally felt ready to “give this one more shot,” but that “you better be nicer about it this time.”

According to dining hall workers, last week served as a little confidence boost for the snack event. Apparently, seeing all of the cliques of sophomore febs waiting outside its doors every night last week reminded the snack that there are still hungry students who are too scared to spend an hour alone and need the event.

The school wide email is certainly receiving a range of responses from the different grades, as seniors neglect to even open the message and freshmen say, “Awesome!” without knowing what the event actually is. Needless to say, overarching these grade divides, every single person on campus is now praying that 10 O’Clock Ross’ inevitable decision to “come back where it belongs” will inspire 4:30 Proc to stop masquerading and revert to its true 4:00 o’clock self.

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