Returning Students Opt to Replace Last Semester’s Bernie Sanders Posters with Diagrams of ‘How to Compost’



Even with their new eco-friendly compost posters, dorm rooms appear to lack spice and hipness without last semester’s Bernie posters

As storage rooms are unpacked and troves of last semester’s junk gets unfolded, students across campus are have been seen replacing their old Bernie Sanders posters with diagrams of how to compost.

Although the Bernie fad raged across all walls around campus last spring, as the general election approaches with Hillary as the democratic candidate, students have been forced to reconsider whether their light blue “Feel the Bern!” laminations are still appropriate and cool. Not unlike their candidate, these students cannot discern when to quit.

As such, many self-reports and surveys indicate that as students veer away from advertising their no longer hip political beliefs, students are tending instead to put up the new equivalent of Bernie posters: large print diagrams of how to compost.

Jack Greham ‘17, a previous Bernie supporter, told a close source, “I was bummed when I realized my ‘Better With Bernie’ poster wasn’t relevant anymore, cause I thought, how will my wall decorations show that I’m informed and cool? But then I picked up this sick composting diagram at a local organic flea market. I’m hoping that will do the trick.”

Notably, although each student surveyed was a registered Democrat, not one of the respondents admitted to even considering an “I’m with Her!” Hillary replacement poster. Apparently, even if she gets their votes, those posters just still do not have that ‘hip’ feel.


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